Thank God

Why is it so hard to translate thoughts into words? Here am I, on this space, doing mindless typing for the past hour or so yet has unsuccessfully found the appropriate words to aid in the conjuring of the breathtaking view that blew me away earlier this morning.

It struck me that something was wrong when I woke up on Sunday morning, thinking that it was Monday and was immediately filled with a dread that could swallow me whole. 
It was not too long ago when I had look forward to going to work and now, it is something I cannot wait to get over and done with.

‘Welcome to the corporate world’, they said and did I not know that I was a willing competitor in this rat race that would eventually make me wither and die in despair?

I realised that my unhappiness at work has tainted the other aspects of my life, that sucks.

For the past few months, my relationship kind of went a little downhill because I am just so negative about life and it is so hard to be loving.
No doubt there were certain issues that need to be smooth out but it could definitely be deal differently such that it will be less painful for us.

I have been so blinded by my negativity that I failed to see that Clement has been trying to make things better for us. He heard my unhappiness and he did something about it.
I really appreciate it, for very honestly, he is the first person I turned to for almost everything.

Though not all the times he empathises but it is comforting and assuring to know that there is someone there for me all the time. The same person who will lend me his shoulder if I need to cry (even if he does not know why I am crying) and the one person who will keep me in his prayers as I have for him.

I have been praying for a forgiving heart and today, as I stared at the cliff flanked by the lush flora and fauna and was in awe of God’s beautiful creation, I realised that God has already answered my prayers. I no longer could remember the things that has made me upset. I supposed this is how I work - to trash things out and let them go until something of relation reminds me of it again. But we have sorted out the one very thing that has been eating me from inside, one Monday morning and hopefully, it will go away, for good.

To Clement: Thanks for all that you have done for me. I cannot put into words how much I love you. Thank you for being the sunshine in my life, for coming to my mind when times are bad and never failing to bring a smile to my face. Thank you for the love you have unconditionally showered on me. I love you, so much.

The glistening water reminded me that life can be simple. That if I had to step away from the carnal world and focus on God, I can be happier than I thought I could be.
God has give me a supportive family and a boyfriend whom means the world to me. And on top of that, I have cousins and friends whom never fail to warm my heart with their companionship.

Thank God.